Lessons from Biggest Loser Resort: Time to cleanse the mind and body!

After reading my friend, Betty’s blog at http://phatchances.blogspot.com, I decided to write tonight. Betty is so inspiring to me and if I can reach just one person the way she reaches me every time she writes, then it’s worth typing through the exhaustion and foregoing a Friday night of debauchery J

For some reason, I woke up today feeling more alert and energized than I normally do. Perhaps it was because I finally got a non-alcohol-induced sleep after treating my body well yesterday, for an entire day! Yes, I did undergo a few struggles while on my trip to the east coast this past weekend. While I had a great time, I now realize how easily I “adapt” to others’ habits and lifestyles! This is not a good thing. I need to find stronger resolve when I’m faced with challenging situations.

When I arrived home on Tuesday, I had some residual emotions that I spoke of in my Valentine’s Day post, and processing brought many things to light. I accomplished what I wanted to on my trip and any open questions I had were answered. Long story, short; I decided to relinquish anything for which I had no control and just “do me.” Giving up those emotions was surprisingly easy once I allowed myself to focus on life in the present! It may have been somewhat symbolic, but I decided to cleanse my body at the same time I was cleansing my mind…. It sounded like a great idea at the time! I could rid myself of all the crap food and gunk in my system while starting fresh in my head and getting refocused on my weight loss journey! Fantastic!

  

  Personal Score:  A
(I'm making progress, both physically and emotionally)

I heard about the “Shakeology Cleanse” but I didn’t know what it was. Since I already had a month’s supply of Shakeology on-hand, I decided to Google it and see if it was something of interest. It seemed easy enough! You do the following for three days:

• WAKE UP: Green tea (no sweetener)
• BREAKFAST: Shakeology Shake with fruit and liquid that does not contain sugar (I used unsweetened Almond Milk and 6 frozen strawberries);
• SNACK: An apple or berries (I ate a Pink Lady apple)
• LUNCH: Shakeology Shake with fruit and liquid that does not contain sugar (to change up the flavors, I used a frozen banana this time)
• SNACK: Another apple
• DINNER: Dark-leaf lettuce with protein – no oil, butter, salt or pepper (boring, but it does the job)
• SNACK: If you’re still hungry, they suggest eating more fruit

First, let me say that this worked for me. Without a doubt, it works. In just two days, I’ve lost more than 4 lbs and I know that “gunk” is leaving my body.

I just wish my stomach wasn’t making so much darned noise! It’s embarrassing! No dates for me this weekend! Ha! With that said, I am noticing some positive differences so far; I am thinking more clearly, my attitude seems more positive, I’m more alert, and I feel “lighter” and healthier. The not-so-positive effects are; I am tired around 2pm, I don’t feel like I’m eating enough, I’m getting dizzy more easily, and my energy depletes more quickly. The instructions say that it’s not advisable to work out while cleansing, because the caloric intake is so low, but I’ve been working out anyway. I believe I am only consuming about 1000 calories while on this cleanse. I know this isn’t enough, but it’s only for three days and I’m hoping it helps to jump-start my metabolism when I go back to my normal 1500-1600 calories per day on Sunday.

I'm sooooo close!!!! My trainer tried to get me to that 179.9 mark today, but we JUST missed it! Maybe tomorrow! This means I'm down 37 lbs since I left BLR and I am down 79 lbs total!

This was my trainer and me after he kicked my butt this morning in a hilacious workout. During the workout, he had me focus on something...er... someone... unpleasant (who just happened to walk by the gym windows) to give me motivation to go at ludicrous speed! At one point while I was struggling on the treadmill, he said, "Focus on your horizon! Get through this! No erratic breathing!" Unfortunately, as I looked out the window, the unpleasant "thing" was right in my line of sight, so my response was, "There's a pile of sh*t in my horizon, sir!"

Our treadmill intervals were at 5.0 incline and sometimes up past 7.0 mph! Can you say jello legs? As if that weren't enough, in the second half hour, I was begging for mercy after 30 minutes of more intervals, sometimes reaching at over 113 RPMs at Level 15 on the bike for as long as my heart and lungs could take it. I hate/love that man! :)



All the cleansing of my mind and body also has me thinking of Essara, my psychologist and life coach at Biggest Loser Resort. There are many days that I make decisions related to what she and I used to discuss and I ask myself, “Would Essara be proud of me?” I wish I could still talk to her at least once per week. Sometimes, I truly don’t know the answer to that question, since it seems emotional growth is often tied to doing something that is emotionally painful. Am I doing the right thing by putting myself through something I know has the potential to hurt me? At what point is “putting up walls” or “closing myself off” a GOOD thing? I do see myself setting clearer boundaries with people in my life that used to walk all over me, but I’m not sure I’m making the progress I need to be making to be successful in the long-term. I miss you, Essara!

I actually have been missing ALL of my BLR buddies! I was chatting with Amanda Tyson this morning and we got on the topic of hiking Nicholas “not so” Flatts. We both had a good laugh about our last attempt, but under no uncertain terms, we plan to tackle and conquer that bitch in May. No doubt we will as we have BOTH come SO far. After texting and talking to a few of my BLR girls, seeing all the Follow Fridays on Twitter, and getting a glance of THIS picture from BLR (I was laughing my butt off! This was Amanda and I on that darned hike! We both thought we were dying!), I realized how important it is to have a huge support system!

I’m so fortunate that no matter what I’m feeling, or when I’m feeling it, I can turn around and one of my BLR sisters or brothers is there for me! I am so lucky to have all of these special people in my life! I truly believe THAT is the biggest key to moving toward success and not giving up! Having people around you that share your struggles, goals, desires, pain, and fears…. As long as you stay in contact with them, you will be forced to be true to yourself and it will be that much more difficult to give up! Thank goodness these people are in my life as I am a much better person for it! I don’t know what I’d do without them on my toughest days.

Another key component, which goes in-hand with the support system, is to always remember where you started! Remember what got you to your “bottom” in the first place and remember how it felt to be there! BUT do NOT confuse this with ridiculing or beating up your former self whenever you see an old picture or someone makes a comment about how you “used to be!”

I get so upset when I hear formerly overweight people look at a past image of themselves and put themselves down! Saying things like, “Look at how gross I was!” or “Who is that disgusting person!?” Why?!?! Isn’t it true that when we were at our highest weights, we couldn’t understand how people could be that cruel to us? How people couldn’t see us for what/who were are on the inside? The whispers when we’d order dessert? How we felt when people wouldn’t even glance our way to say hello? Being treated like an animal or sub-standard human being when something didn’t fit like a seat or a seatbelt? All awful!!!!

I get that you don’t want to go back to being miserable and feeling unattractive, but it’s not healthy to treat your old self like someone you don’t know and don’t ever want to be. Behind that exterior, there was a person that was full of love, desperation, hope, and sadness! I am positive you beat yourself up enough back then! I know I did! Enough is enough. How would you have felt if someone you knew, loved, and trusted spoke to you back then, the way you are speaking about your former self now? It’s important to remember why you don’t want to go back, but also remember that the depressed and broken person in that picture was a suffering human being. If anything, they deserve love and respect for helping you achieve who you are today and who you’re working to become. Love yourself, past and present, because both of you deserve it!

See you on the fit side!

-Heather

Valentine's Day: It doesn't have to be Hallmark's version!

I am sitting on a plane, reflecting upon the last few days, as the sun peers up over the ocean and the New York City skyline. I love the way the rays dart through the morning haze as if to promise me there is a greater power doing everything possible to bring light and brightness into my morning. For a city that never sleeps, New York sure is beautiful when everyone else is just waking up. It’s currently 4:30 AM in California and I’m heading home after a whirlwind extended weekend of fun and a little romance.

It’s been a long time since I’ve allowed my heart to feel the happiness I’ve felt over the past few days. But, I wanted to make sure I enjoyed every minute that was granted to me, just in case it was a one-time occurrence. I have to give myself a lot of credit! My psychologist at BLR helped me to discover that I was not living in the moment, prior to working on bettering myself. Lately, I have been making a concerted effort to do the exact opposite and really pay attention to “now.”

Naturally, because it is Valentine’s Day, I am also thinking about love and what it has meant to me in my life. There are days when I absolutely love my life and I’m thankful for everything in it. There are days that I wish I could numb myself to sleep so that I don’t have to feel anything or think about what might have been, but may never be (I call these my "stinkin' thinkin' days")…. And there are days like today, where my heart is aflutter with joy and anticipation, but my stomach is in knots because it fears the journey my heart wants to take. However, I am happy and excited about life! Allow me to provide some background into my emotional quotient:

I grew up believing families were supposed to be like The Cleavers or The Huxtables. Contrary to many of my friends’ families, I wasn’t exposed to fighting, arguing, and disrespect between my parents. My parents took disagreements behind closed doors and had “discussions.” Up to this day, I have never seen them fight. They love each other, they date, and they respect each other. Most importantly, they've grown together (with a lot of work and evolving) instead of growing apart over 40+ years.

My mom was an at-home Betty Crocker-style mom who always cooked hearty breakfasts every morning and a balanced meal for dinner every night. The family sat at the dining table together to eat. No TV and no other distractions allowed. She decided to quit her job to raise three children and my dad worked tirelessly as a laborer for a retail food chain to support the entire family. I didn’t know it at the time, but we had absolutely no money. Knowing now what my parents had to do and sacrifice to provide for their children, and ensure we had the same opportunities as others in life with money, I honestly don’t know how they accomplished all that they did.

I don’t remember “wanting” for anything until I was an older, bratty, selfish teenager who felt inexplicably entitled, misunderstood, and disadvantaged in life. I shiver to even type this because it pains my heart to know that I ever hurt my parents in any way. Yet, throughout our upbringing, they managed to stay together, grow together, love each other, and show complete respect for each other.

My dad has always been my protector. I always thought about how lucky I was to have a super dad who was pretty darned bad-ass. He was strong, tall, muscular, and had a way of intimidating ill-intented people. Everyone in the neighborhood knew that he would turn into the Incredible Hulk if someone laid a hand on me. He would scare off boys that were mean to me and was always the first to my aid if I got hurt. Granted, my mom would tell you I was a “big baby” growing up, so it was hard for her to tell when I was actually hurt, versus when I was looking for attention, but somehow my dad always seemed to know the difference. In 6^th grade, I had a lot of pain in my shoulder after being tackled on the soccer field. Mom thought I was complaining to get out of doing the dishes. Dad thought otherwise and took me to the hospital. I had a broken collar bone... Around the time of my 14^th birthday, my abdomen felt like a little monster was inside, ripping apart my organs. Mom thought I just had cramps and kept feeding me Advil, even though I told her it wasn’t “that time.” Dad took one look at me, and carried me out the door to the emergency room. I had appendicitis and it was ready to burst.

Dad also tried to protect me emotionally. When I was about 22 years old, I was visiting my parents’ home and my dad hired my then-boyfriend (Corey) of two years, to do some extensive re-wiring to his entertainment system. Corey was almost 3 hours late and I could see my dad was frustrated. When Corey arrived, I asked why he was late and I tried to explain that my dad had plans and I considered it disrespectful to not at least call to say he was delayed. Corey snapped at me, told me to mind my own business, and somehow (I forget how), made me believe it was my fault, and that it was the last time he’d ever do a “favor” for my family. I was so hurt, I ran into the garage and sat on the steps, sobbing with my head in my arms. I had no idea that my dad had heard the whole interaction.

My dad found me in the garage, came up behind me and simply said, “I know you like this guy, but Heather, I would NEVER treat your mother that way.” He patted me on the shoulder and left. I have never forgotten that moment. Why, after seeing such a great example of how a couple in love should treat each other, was I willing to endure even the slightest emotional mistreatment? Why was it so difficult to find a relationship like my parents’? With an ideal like them to live up to, dating has been a challenge, to say the least.

For some reason, the reality of love and relationships is more vivid and hitting me harder this year than it has in the past. Maybe it’s because my dad was diagnosed with cancer and I’m being forced to face his mortality? He’s always been a pillar of super-human strength and tremendous character for me…. My super hero… Maybe it’s because my last serious relationship was so tumultuous (every time I hear the song, “Love the Way You Lie” and Eminem sings, “It’s like when a tornado meets a volcano”… that reminds me of that relationship). Or, maybe I’m just getting older?

Whatever the case, I tend to think about my dad and my family when I think of my past relationships and what I hope my future will hold. I go to bed at night and I envision my heart will soon be full with the love of a good man. There are so many reminders of a slightly empty heart, waiting for its complement: A smile from a stranger. A conversation on a plane. Children laughing as they play. Couples holding hands… and alas, Valentine’s Day, or as I saw it termed on Facebook, “National Singles Awareness Day.” So funny, but...Word.

As the days go by, the visions of love slowly fade, but the desire to live the dream becomes more intense when I allow myself to pay attention to it. It’s like that good dream for which you desperately try to fall back to sleep, if only to have the experience for one more moment. I've been in love before, but it has been a very very long time.

I think about the path I've wandered through life and it's not that I have regrets... I just want to start the next chapter and do it with my new-found self, and soon. I want to grant my heart and soul the love I deserve, and I want my dad to be able to walk me down the aisle before it’s too late, knowing I have a man in my life who will take just as good care of me as he has. For now, I am taking care of my own heart and trying with all my might to keep it open and receptive to love.

For everyone who has someone to love today, celebrate your love and be sure to express to them why you fell in love with them in the first place! Be thankful for what you have and try not to dwell on what you are “missing.” I guarantee you there is someone out there who would gladly trade places with you. Thank you to all my friends and family for giving me so much love over the years! I love you all! I may be single on this holiday, but I had a pretty darned good weekend, where I felt special and cared for. For that, I have every reason to celebrate today in my own way.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

See you on the fit side!

-Heather

Last Day in Utah and a layover in Vegas…

I don’t think any of us knew how tired and sore that Vigor 5K obstacle course would make us the next day! I woke up with the pinched nerve in my neck at full salute, sore shoulder muscles, and bruises all over the inside of my arms from scaling those precarious walls! It sure was a lot of fun, though! I tried waking up at 6 AM to get in a decent workout (since I knew I was going to be on planes most of the day), but my body wasn’t having it. I opted for a little FaceBook time and a few pokes to the SNOOZE button.

At 8:30 AM, we met in the lobby of the hotel and headed out to the church in town. The Mormon Tabernacle choir was performing and it was being televised. As you may have guessed from my last post and my religious faux pas, I know very little about Mormons or the Tabernacle Choir, but they are apparently a really big deal. After hearing them sing, I understand why. The music was beautiful and uplifting. The atmosphere was tranquil and warm. As we walked into the hall, I was immediately taken aback at how vast and expansive the space was! The area where the organ stood majestically was reminiscent of Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas. The ceiling was domed and had a beautiful blue lighted hue to it. The organ was massive (haha… sorry… couldn’t resist), and the enormous gold pipes went from the floor to the ceiling, which I would guess was the equivalent of 4 or 5 stories high. The choir flanked the organ and sang in perfect harmony. All women dressed in flowy, angelic-like robes and the men were sharp and smart in their suits with red ties. It really did take my breath away!

The orchestra was also mesmerizing and enchanting! I found myself daydreaming of a time when I was playing in a symphony orchestra. My imagination ran away for a moment to reading sheet music and I even found my hands ghosting the key strokes to Flight of the Bumblebee… but only for a moment. It actually made me a bit sad to think that I had so easily given up that part of my life, when in retrospect, it was one of the few things (if not the only thing) I was ever truly passionate about. I lived it and breathed it! Since that time, I have found that there are things I am good at, but I lack the passion to really immerse myself to the point where I’m living and breathing whatever it is…. I forced myself to refocus on the choir and just listen to the music. I knew this could only have a positive, uplifting affect, thereby thwarting the depressive path my mind began to head down a moment prior. It worked.

I’m not sure if Meg saw the somber expression on my face as my mind was going through a silent turmoil, but as though she were spying on my thoughts, she looked over at me, put her hand on my knee and patted it as if to say, “I love you and it’s all going to be ok.” For that moment, that’s exactly what I believed.

One of Meg’s friends, Desiree, sings in the choir… it is apparently quite an honor! They have to have an immense amount of knowledge about music and be masterful singers. We met her at the end of the performance and even though I had never met or heard of her, it felt a little bit like meeting a celebrity.

After the choir performance, we had a nice breakfast at Mimi’s, where we met up with more of Meg’s friends as a final gathering of sorts, in Utah. All of her friends are really nice and each of them bring something unique and interesting to the table. I was wondering what my “unique and interesting” trait was that helped me make the cut into Meg’s world <smile>.

After breakfast, we packed up back at the hotel room and set a few heart-felt messages to friends on Twitter <grin>. I was stewing over the fact that one of my friends declined picking me up at the airport, even though I do quite a bit for him. He’s not working right now and I knew he’d be home, so I was getting irritated as I was texting him. Meg reminded me that it was Super Bowl Sunday (I didn’t really care, since the 49ers lost in that bogus game with the Giants, thereby losing their spot in the Super Bowl), so I had completely forgotten this tidbit of info. Meg then went on to explain that he’d probably be wasted anyway and in no shape to take me home. She was right. His next text confirmed he was already well on his way to happy land and he suggested a cab would be a much smarter choice. Indeed. Cab it is. A little self-reflection told me that I still have a lot to work on in the areas of ego, trust and patience. <sigh>

I had a layover in Las Vegas, where I did a little gambling and won a tiny bit of money. It was fun! I slipped up on my nutrition, though. At about 4:45pm, I was hungry and out of snacks, except for some cashews, which at that point may as well have been brussel sprouts. No way was I eating them, no matter how hungry I was… I realized I wouldn’t be home until after 8pm tonight. I didn’t want to grab a full meal at some nasty airport joint, so I grabbed a pretzel from Auntie Anne’s… with cheese. You know the plastic cheese they put on nachos at the ball park? The kind that stays in your system for like ten years? Yah, that cheese. <grimace>. You’d think I would have at least said, “No butter and no salt” on the pretzel… but no. I just wanted a buttery, salty, cheesy pretzel. I’m not going to lie… it tasted amazing BUT my stomach begged to differ. As a matter of fact, it’s still begging, differing, flipping me off, and screaming at me. Oh, how easily I tend to forget that butter is not my friend! I think I need one of those medical bracelets to remind me to stay away from all butter and cream because it inevitably launches an attack on my digestive system that results in utter nuclear fallout. So, here I am, on my flight back to Sacramento from Vegas, and I’m suffering a wee bit. As good as that pretzel was, it was SOOOO not worth it. Not even a little bit. Did anyone see the movie, Soul Plane? I am NOT going into that airplane bathroom. No way.

The weekend went by so quickly! I can’t believe it’s already over! While we were packing to leave today, I suddenly realized that I have an early meeting in San Mateo, CA tomorrow! Ack! I hadn’t rented a car, nor did I reserve a hotel room! Looks like I’m going to have to run to Hertz when they open first thing tomorrow morning and hope that I can get on the road in time to make the meeting. I’m exhausted from my trip, but I still plan to wake up, go to the gym, and fit in some P90X before I hit the road, so I’d better get some good sleep tonight.

See you on the fit side!

-Heather

Ropes and planks and snow, oh my! (Vigor 5K) and Meg's Birthday in Utah!

***** Meg just educated me on Mormons and Christianity. My apologies if I offended anyone by what I said below. I honestly didn't know and I was raised without religion. I just didn't want to assume that everyone prays, because I don't. Meg is an awesome friend for being so patient with a heathen like myself :-) *****

What a trip so far!

I am exhausted! Meg has SO much energy! I wish I could bottle it up and sell it! She's still going strong and out on the town while I lie here in my hotel room bed, hopped up on Midol, and blogging about what has happened in the last 24 hours or so...

Last night, we went to Rio Cafe for dinner just after landing in Salt Lake City. I was told by Meg and Amanda Tyson that this restaurant was bomb.com, but I think I "healthed up" my salad a little too much. It tasted ok, but it definitely tasted healthy and looked NOTHING like the scrumptious salads I saw others enjoying. However, meeting Meg's friends was lots of fun! She seems to know everyone in this state! Everywhere we go, someone she knows just happens to be there! And it's no surprise, but they are all happy to see her. I thought for a moment whether this could ever happen to me, then I had to chuckle... I definitely have a few people from my past that would not be excited to see me during a happenchance meeting! But, then again, Meg is much nicer than I am on a consistent basis :)

The bottom left pic was a funny moment, but you had to be there. Someone left his coat behind - size Medium. Meg decided to wear it. Haha! The bottom right pic is Meg and I trying to do our best "Courtney" pose! She knows what we're talkin' about!


I began my morning today with a little yoga to ensure I was stretched well enough for our race today. Then, I donned my crazy cheetah hat and bundled up just in time for room service to arrive with my scrambled egg and bowl of oatmeal with skim milk. Yum!

I was proud of myself for starting the day off right, but quickly realized yoga did very little good for me in the freezing cold. As we were driving to Park City, we learned that the temperature was around 5 balmy degrees at the race site. Ummm... what? My poor muscles are going to freeze and seize! I'm gonna be a Heathercicle. This Cali girl had no idea what 5 degrees felt like and wasn't so eager to find out! By the time we arrived, the temperature had doubled...which meant bupkiss. Still seriously cold. I'm glad we all had our crazy hats to keep us warm! Isn't Meg's birthday hat the cutest?!?!?


The Vigor 5K was a lot of fun and in such a beautiful setting! The race was well organized and the obstacle courses were challenging but doable! We scaled walls made of wood, rope, planks with chains... we shot wrist-rockets at clay pigeons... we tobogganed down a hill that we first had to run up... and we crawled through a maze of rope in the snow. "The chicken" (Jen - AKA girl wearing chicken hat) and I scaled the plank wall twice! I'm shocked at how much my upper body and core have increased in strength from P90X and Yoga! What a difference! No way I would have been able to conquer those obstacles three short months ago! Fist pump!

The night before, I attempted to run a few miles and my lungs were on FIRE because I wasn't acclimated to the holy-mother-it's-effing-freezing weather. But, my lungs held up during this race! The other pleasant surprise I had was that it wasn't as difficult to run in the snow as I had anticipated. In the powder, it felt like Malibu beach all over again, but in the packed snow, it was kind of fun! I really felt that core working! My feet started to freeze by mile 2, but it was still an enjoyable jog! Utah really is beautiful in the snow!

We did have one mishap. As our friend, Joni, was scaling the rope wall, her shoe got stuck in one of the squares and she fell backward to the ground. Her head hit with an audible THUMP on the packed snow.


It was scary at first, because she looked like she was hurt pretty badly. The paramedics came and looked her over. They suggested she ride back with them, but she insisted on finishing the race - dizzy, in pain, and enduring a massive headache. I was totally worried the whole time and kept thinking of Liam Neeson's late wife and her ski accident. I know I got a little preachy, but head injuries are nothing to mess with.




Joni made it to the finish line and true to our plan, we all finished together. It felt good to take the final photo at the finish line! So much fun! Meg's Bodybugg registered more than 20,000 steps and almost 3700 Calories! Incredible! I would really love to do the Vigor 5K, or some other snow race, again!

The race took longer than expected and we were all starving, so we headed to a little cafe called "Chick's." The funny part about this portion of our day is that we drove up and down the "main strip" of a little Podunk town, trying to find a place to eat. When Meg asked, "What do you want?" I said I didn't care as long as it wasn't fried food. Turns out that Chick's was a good ol' down-home country fried diner. We had no idea until we were walking inside! I resorted to ordering breakfast: two scrambled eggs and a slice of ham. The center picture on the left is what was served to someone else dining at the table... look at all that BUTTER and grease! Ugh! I could hear the arteries clogging with every bite!

After our so-unhealthy-it-should-have-been-featured-at-a-state-fair lunch, we headed back to the hotel to dress for Meg's birthday celebration. We met her family at a little restaurant called Cocolito's. As we walked in, the entire restaurant sang Happy Birthday to Meg! I was in shock! How did they get the whole restaurant to sing to her when she walked in AND they all sounded like they've had extensive choir practice!!! My jaw dropped! As it turns out, every last one of those people were members of Meg's family! HUGE family! Holy cow!!! It looked more like the number of guests you'd find at a wedding reception, not a night out for someone's birthday! Instead of introducing me to everyone individually, Meg let everyone finish singing, then announced in her best announcer voice, "Everyone, this is my friend, Heather from California!" I got about what seemed like hundreds of hellos in return! At the end of the night, even though it was Meg's birthday, she gave her little niece a gift and it just lit up that little girl's face! Isn't she cute? She looks a lot like Meg!


It was so nice to be a part of this day with Meg and to meet her friends and family! They all seem like such nice, wonderful, genuine people who care for her tremendously! It's refreshing to see that much love in one room!

I'm heading to bed a little early so that I can get up in the morning and head to the gym before Meg takes me out to my first Mormon church experience. I just pray (do Mormon's pray?) that I don't get kicked out of the church or spontaneously burst into flames when I walk through the doors. I'll be on my best behavior, I promise.

Before I go, though, the night wouldn't be complete without at least one Fitsperational Quote:

See you on the fit side!

-Heather

Flying to Utah for the Vigor 5K with Biggest Loser Buddies!

Vigor 5K, Here I come! I'm currently on a flight between Phoenix and Salt Lake City, using Southwest's new Wifi-On-Board. Look at me, blogging at 30,000 feet!


I am on my "disposable" mini laptop, so I'm not too worried about hackers getting to me. Besides, with all the iPads and other devices I see, they'll probably get bored reading my blog traffic and sifting through music before any damage is done. Security by deterrence! Plan: Bore the hacker to death and they'll move on to the next unsecured chump.

I stepped on the scale this morning and was surprised that I didn't see it reflect massive bloating and lack of exercise! My weight was actual down by a fraction of a pound since my last post. Truth be told: I know I got down to 182 on Tuesday morning, but I am not allowed to count it because my weight went back up and I didn't bother to blog about it. I don't have my other computer with me to create the FAT STAT graphic, so...

CURRENT WEIGHT: 183.6 lbs

  Personal Score:  D
I'll get back on track... we all have bad days and sometimes we just need a break. It doesn't mean that we are quitting, it just means we have pressed the "PAUSE" button.

Another milestone reached!

I probably travel by plane an average of once per month. The last time I took a flight was the day I left the Biggest Loser Resort. I remembered being excited to sit in my seat, anticipating I would see a noticeable difference in how a plane seat felt just three weeks before. However, there was seemingly no difference. Aside from possibly being able to cinch the belt a smidgen more than normal, I will still extremely uncomfortable and the seat arms still had to be put up in order for my big booty to fit without being crushed! I also realized that I still had trouble bending over to retrieve items beneath the seat in front of me and I still couldn't cross my legs when I sat down! What the heck? Over 20 lbs lighter and no difference! That's some bullsh*t! I was really disappointed. If you recall from my former blog posts, that day was... er... "interesting" and more eventful than I would have liked anyway, so I was feeling ultra-sensitive to anything that "went wrong."

Fast-forward 45 days later...Today I boarded a plane to Utah. It was the same style Boeing 737 Southwest Airlines plane that I had boarded 45 days before. For some reason, I wasn't even thinking about my seat (probably because it's now Friday and I haven't had a good workout since Tuesday), nor was I thinking about what had happened during my last plane trip. I was just texting with some friends and eagerly anticipating my flight to Utah to see Meg and her friends for her birthday 5K.

I sat down.... whoa.... the seat belt was let out too much... that never happens.... huh. Still didn't think much of it. I put my stuff under the seat and immediately remembered that I wanted to use my laptop during my flight. I bent over to retrieve it.... no issues whatsoever. Hmmmm... at this point, I was thinking, "It's so nice that my back isn't in pain anymore and I am able to bend over to get stuff!"... but that was it.... until...

I crossed my legs and continued to text on my iPhone. As if a giant light bulb went off in my head, I looked down and blurted out, "Holy sh*t!" Thank goodness the passengers were still loading and it was a bit noisy! But, I couldn't believe my eyes! Not only were both arm rails down without even coming close to touching my hips, but I could SEE THE EDGES of my SEAT! AND My legs were crossed!!! I immediately sent texts to everyone in my life that I knew would completely understand what a milestone moment this was for me. I began to tear up a little bit because I was so happy and I never thought this day would come! Even now, while writing this, I am looking down at my hips and getting misty-eyed. I literally thought plane seats were invented to give women low self-esteem. I've never actually heard a plane seat talk, but if they did, I would have heard them screaming, "You're fat!" over the last fifteen years! They must be one of the cruelest inanimate objects on the planet!

But today, I have beat the plane seat! I beat it like a bully on the playground that has taunted me for far too long. I win, plane seat! Ha! As wonderful as the moment was, it was elevated to amazing by being able to share what was happening over text message with friends I love so dearly! I really do have some super amazing and supportive friends! Thank you, all!



Honestly, I really let my nutrition slip this week. I ate out way too often and didn't make smart choices. I ingested WAY too much salt, and I didn't work out, at least not since Tuesday. I even missed my personal training appointment on Thursday morning. Poor Chris was waiting for me at 6am and I was nowhere to be found. My mind just wasn't in it.  Traveling was tougher for me than I anticipated. I understand now that I'll have to make some changes to my normal travel options in order to fit in workouts and nutrition. Here is a list of bad things I did this week:

Monday night:

I went out with Cara and Betty. Ate a plate of linguini. (But I passed on the bread and the free desserts)... Not so bad, except that I actually considered this my 10% for the week! Alicia called it (on Facebook) when she advised that I not use all of my 10% on Monday.... keep on reading for the epic fail....

Tuesday:

Skipped all my workouts (5am, 12 noon and 6pm) since I was commuting 45 min each way and my days were starting earlier and ending later than normal. I still could have gotten my booty out of bed at 4am, but, I didn't.

For breakfast, I ordered two scrambled eggs with diced ham from our work cafe. Throughout the day, I kept filling my mouth with cashews, banana chips, Ranier cherries and grazed on raspberries and blackberries all day with no real portion control. For lunch, I ate too large of a portion of a spicy stir-fry from our cafe; chicken, chili paste, hot oil, onions, and carrots over 3/4 cup of brown rice. At the end of the day, I had eaten 1/4 bag of banana chips, 1/8 cup of cashews, 1/2 container of each kind of berry and almost a full bag of cherries.

Wednesday:

Sushi (no rice) with Teriyaki sauce for lunch, 3 oz seared tuna and edamame. Drove home and thought about fast-food since I was so hungry, but I didn't stop. I reached for the bag of banana chips and ate until I wasn't feeling hungry... about 1/4 cup. Dinner is where I really blew it. I ate pizza. Super thin crust with chicken and spinach, but pizza none-the-less. This is where the downward spiral truly began.

Thursday:

Well, I blew it on Wednesday, right? So, I may as well eat what I want on Thursday! (Why do we do this to ourselves? I know better than this!) I had a Shakeology on the way to work, but found myself getting hungry around 10:30am... I went to lunch around 11am with a co-worker and ordered grilled fish tacos from Chevy's with black beans. I also ate quite a few of their chips with salsa... almost like I couldn't stop. I caught myself doing the mindless eating thing, but only after I noticed the chip basket was empty and my co-worker had stopped eating them long before that. I had two of the three fish tacos, no rice, and half the black beans. That couldn't have been good. Flour tortillas and all that sodium! As if that were not enough sabotage for the day, I headed home and went to lunch #2 with Marisa at 3:30pm. Mexican food again! Somebody stop me! I ordered the yummy carnitas from Zocalo. More flour tortillas. More chips and salsa. Didn't eat all of that plate during one sitting, but my body was definitely on carb and sodium overload. I'm guessing that, by this point, I've ingested about 1600 calories and approximately 3000mg of sodium. Ugh! Apparently I didn't have enough because I went home in full-on emo-eating mode and at about 9pm, I finished the rest of the carnitas and pickled onions with another tortilla. Where are the obnoxious alarms and red flashing lights when you need them! I've been pwnd by food. Meh! RESET!

Friday:

This morning's breakfast consisted of egg whites, 1oz of light mozzarella, whole wheat flax seed tortilla and two slices of turkey bacon. Yummy and filling! After that, I grabbed some beef jerky for snacking during the day (I don't arrive in Utah until 5:30pm) and boarded my flight out of Sacramento.

I actually woke up this morning with the attitude that "Today is a new day. I'm leaving tomorrow behind me." I identified where the emo eating came from and I'm over it. (Why do I let insignificant people rent space in my head for even a minute? DUMB!) So, I posted a derogatory comment about Neanderthals on Facebook and I felt much much better! Who knew that Facebook could be so therapeutic! Plus, friends that know me well also know that I'm the type to post sarcastic comments just because I think I'm hilarious sometimes, especially when someone pisses me off...Don't worry about me. Aside from being incredibly resilient, I have a bit of a silver tongue. My posts are not intended to provoke sympathy or comments like, "What happened? Are you ok?" I just want to make people laugh with me through a crappy moment in my day. So, a simple "LOL" or the like is highly appropriate and welcome. :-)

My workout is coming up. After the saga of the plane seat having a happy ending, I am going to reward my body with cardio and a few carbs tonight (for plenty of energy for tomorrow). I wanted to hit the gym when I woke up today, but I ended up behind schedule. So, I arrived at the airport in my gym clothes. This will be very convenient when I check into my hotel this evening, because I can just head straight to the hotel's gym for 30-45 minutes, with no excuses! That should give me enough time to shower and wait for Meg so that we can all meet up for dinner and have some fabulous Mexican salad at one of her favorite places around 7:30pm Utah time.

I am very excited about this weekend and I am hoping to blog daily while I am in Utah. I want to journal all of my experiences throughout this trip, and I don't want to forget a thing! Plus, I can't wait until we are able to wear our crazy hats and look like a bunch of goofballs! Fun awaits!

See you on the fit side!

-Heather